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Malanka
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Posts posted by Malanka
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Is he an Artiste? Guffaw or what?
love you John
Lincolnshire sausages rule !
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Didn’t anyone on this thread have a catapult.
Both my brother and I did. My dad supplied the ball bearings too. Evil little things, and deadly with practice.
just sayin. More tea Vicar?
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You bad man ..lol
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How about this for a relaxing summer evening at the waterside Inn
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Here you go Ray.
We have to put up with this everyday when the sun shines, just can't get away from the damn things, they're everywhere.
Its tuff but somones got to do it...
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He he John, is that fence post comfortable ?...LOL
I like large moorings because the atmosphere at barbeque time can be very good. I like small bijou moorings becuase they can be quiet and intimate. I don't like inconsiderately moored very large or even not that large boats with fishing tackle off either end of the boat deliberately taking up the space other boats could moor in if they just moved up a bit.
Apart from that little gripe everything is peachy.
M
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Yes yes a beauty contest to decide the amount of the toll, and an owners beauty contest to determine if you can actually drive said tolled boat... Excellent, oh wait, hold on a minute..... err on second thoughts perhaps not...
He he for the benefit of those with no SOH, that's satire.
M
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Noooo currently in Thöreshaus, Canton of Bern, Switzerland looking at the mountains and smelling like cow poo.
Oh the mountains. Did I mention, the Eiger, the Jungfrau, Finsteraarhorn (down which all our water flows) via the Aare.
Glacial melt water is blue by the way, it doesn't look green at all. Most peculiar first time you see it.
I will get Fiona to post a picture for you. You have the broads I have the Alps.
M
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In the US they call merging lanes the zipper merge, in Germany most autobahn "on" ramps have such a system, they also always have crossing at the off which doesnt happen on UK motorways.
By crossing I mean on and off the road via the same set of two lanes which means cars on, and cars off, have to cross each others paths.
Bearing in mind you could be merging with a de-restricted autobahn where the car coming down the road could be doing 140 mph or even more. You're supposed to not pass merging lanes in the right lane at such speed but some do.
I used to use the A81 near Bonn every day for years and every day spent at least 70 or 80 km of the 91 km journey well above 160 kph. Was quite fun passing the fuzz as they stuck to the recommended 130kph. I have spent many hours cruising through Germany very safely at well over 160 kph (100mph). It's not until you stop you realise how hard you were concentrating (I hope), looking ahead and not driving off the front edge of the bonnet is an essential skill I unfortunately don't see that much of especially on the A12 in Essex. Serious question, do they have rear view mirrors in cars on the A12?
OK off for another lie down now....
Cow smell has gone as I can't smell it anymore, or I have turned into a cow.
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Yes Ken was not a happy bunny when the new sit down and take out chippy opened right opposite to him.
I used to go in when that new place was a cafe but not since it's the chippy it now is. They use polystyrene trays not paper so a downer for me that is. The old place used to do a stunning plate pie, was gorgeous. I love plate pie cos I'm northern you see.
Plate pie and buttered muffin.... tell me to stop I'm salivating......
OMG it's torture can't get pie of of my head now, I'm going for a lie down.
M
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Thanks Guys
I'm not totally bonkers as the lady from Coventry is leased, and the new Lexus is also leased. Having said that did I mention we need new cabin tops and electrics for the top of Malanka at the end of the season. No sun kissed beaches in the Maldives this spring.
I daren't tot up using invoices, spreadsheets or anything else. We have a simple criterion, if we can currently afford it we do it.
Our family motto through premature deaths and near death experiences is simple.
LIFE IS TOO SHORT
Live it to the fullest.
M
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The Chip Inn in Long Stratton, another beef dripping establishment.
Yes I know it's not on the boards but its a part of our journey when we use the Harwich ferry or get an early train. (shuts at 21:30 so get there early)
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Forgive me for being impertinent however there is an assumption in the original premise of the statement about private moorings and private boats which is simply not the case.
There are no hirers who pay as much into the local economy as someone who rents a mooring, services and upgrades their boat reasonably regularly, and then occasionally spends eye watering sums for restoration or repair, or in fact to buy a boat in the first place. That money goes somehwere! After all it doesn't evaporate. All this private spending is very likely, mostly (an assumption pls use discretion) money which is brought in from outside the local area and then spent in the local environment/economy providing jobs and income for many people. In my particular case foreign money from a completely different country and I am not alone either, there are quite a few non uk resident owners..
There used to be many more hire boats and so many more people employed in the hiring industry with many more boat yard moorings but that era has gone, it's dead and buried. It died because folks lost money and some didn't close up shop early enough and lost their everything as well.
We should accept that hire yards are service providers, the service they provide is the ability to visit the lovely Broads, cruise up and down and get hooked as we all did once, without having to own their own boat. Their entire infrastructure as it's being refered to is entirely in their interests and collectively theirs alone. They are not altruistic 19th century entrepreneurs like Cadbury or Salt, ask Richos or one of the other survivors, they don't waste money. The bean counters who now heavily influence much of UK business (sorry if you're an accountant) are hard headed business men and women who do not spend penny one unless it makes sound business sense. They are risk averse, bottom line focussed and absolutely do not build infrastructure for the benefit of anyone except their business. Those that did are long gone and no longer a business. Richardsons do not invest 250,000 plus on an RC45 unless the Return On Investment makes sense to the bank man who provides the investment opportunity to the business.
I think a few have forgotten what the broads used to be like in the late 60's and through to the 1970's. It may indeed have been a golden era of hiring with 3000 / 5000 plus boats of many shapes and sizes however. Few Herons such that a sighting was a rare thing, few kingfishers, filthy stinking water and straight through toilets. A pootle up the Ant behind a 15 to 20 strong train of boats was not unusual. I viscerally remember cruising to almost darkness trying to find somewhere to stop and that's how my fondness for mudweighting originated.
I don't recognise this longed for past as any sort of golden era. We, today have issues but nothing like the huge environmental considerations of only a few decades ago. We have fantastic boats available for hire with amazing facilities from four or five very innovative suppliers (yes gosh times change go figure that). We have the improved facilities in Salhouse and I remember the outcry at the cost of mooring increase. I am a half full kind of guy and fail to see the relevance of the number, location or use level of private boats being an issue for anyone other than the providers of their mooring and the owners themselves.
Speaking personally we intend to visit in July for two weeks and August for only one week as August is busy with UK families and we can visit when they can't in July and so we do. We have already spent a lovely Easter break floating as well. So I'm afraid I simply don't see the issue some obviously have with private boats. I hired for 35 years and could only afford a boat once a year or in one year twice, and always used Martham boats before I bought our old lady.
In the last eight years we as a family have spent at least three, sometimes four weeks afloat every single year, and once, whilst between opportunities...... A continuous 79 days (was bliss) floating. Our contribution to the local economy which seems to be a bone of contention for some, is likely greater in the last 8 years than in the 35 before that and I don't regret anything.
More tea anyone??
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He means the one that uses beef dripping I very much hope... the green painted one. Northern chap very nice, hates the VAT man....
M
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Sorry peeps , I get back from San Diego on the Friday night. I am a very good racket thee person though. Northern for guess and get it right kind of guy. Saved me hours with curtain rails in the past. If it looks right it is.. Never mind all that measuring ...lol
You will have my wholehearted moral support.
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Something I tell my teens now two twenty somethings REGULARLY...
Teaching of Physics and Engineering basics sadly lacking in modern schools it seems. Where is that Wheat Stone Bridge gone when you need it ...LOL
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Hi Vaughan
Your point is very well made and taken however it's a little late, as they already are using 12v charging. We had several 12 sockets installed when we upgraded the electrics. They are very discreet as I didn't want ugly plastic 12 sockets all over the mahogany panel interior.
Time for a rant........
The issue is that those on board under 25 streaming video and facetiming really kills the phone batteries. They do it all the time 24/7, so they are charging everything in cigar chargers all the time. We have two and three m long charging cables too. Looks like an explosion is a spaghetti factory at times. The other issue is the way teenagers graze the fridge (Waeco 80L) every five minutes, the poor thing has time to cool down a bit and someone gets something else to eat out of it after gazing inside leaning on the door for five minutes and the cycle starts again.
My youngest (17) can, and does, play FiFA, text, and also stream video, or facetime on three different devices all AT THE SAME TIME AND HOLD A CONVERSATION VIA HEADPHONES with someone else. Its simply incredible.
Rant over......
One good tip though would be to buy a phone sim top up that is unlimited data for a limited period (say a month )and then put that into your dongle...He he Dongle takes up to 5 or ten devices Bob's your Aunty. Easy for us as we have unlocked Phones by law here in Switzerland.
The most ridiculous thing I can think of is using an inverter to convert 12 v to 240 v then use an adapter to take it back to 12v to charge devices... Makes my blood boil. Hence the 12v sockets.
Smart chargers don't make the task easy either if the batteries are under significant load or damaged in any way as well. We had a dicky engineering battery cell last season (just one) and the smart charger had a fit of not charging the others fully even though we pootled all day. New battery fixed it.
For interest our biggest real issue is the wiring for the ceiling lights as that is the ORIGINAL wax paper wrapped wiring from 1952. 66 years old and leaking current all over the place. All the rest was replaced 8 years ago with state of the art stuff, inverter, domestic and inverter suitcase batteries x4 almost 900 Ah, smart charger et al (all hidden so you can't see it of course). That lot of vintage crinkly wiring is set to be removed at the end of this season when we replace the cabin tops and the sloped cabin tops/sides with new grey lino with hessian backing and brown track mark for the edges. No modern fixes. The wallet is getting plenty of notice and no crying will be permitted. (will be posted in the restoration thread)
Any sympathy greatly received.....
Remind me again why we bought a wooden boat. Love and being a tiny bit potty as a fruit bat.
See you all floating.
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We are about to have solar panels fitted under the silly masty thing. So we can keep making ice cubes when we stop early in the summer and its 30 degrees (ok I'm optimistic) without running down the batteries too much, the kids (all three of em) with 90 million electric 12v devices (Ipad, Iphone , lappy and so on) on charge all the time really saps the energy. I'm swallowing my hypochrisy over the mining of the rare earth metals though. Feel quite bad about that.
Anyone remember the flood light scandal and solar farms? The feed in tarrif was so high it still made money to run a diesel generator to flood light the solar panels to send voltage to the grid at night. they got found out though.... OOPs... Only in California of course ....
Modern ones are so much better than the early models and use way less rare earth metals per panel and are way more efficient too. Apart from the mining spoilage issue, they are for me great things. So I would say go for it.
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You could try dumping the tinned tomato and substituting self chopped fresh Beef Tomato instead. Much less acidic as it's more flesh less liquid and if you add puree to the pan when frying the meat and fry that too it simulates the flavour of sun dried tomato rather well. I always try and use fresh basil too as it's a much gentler taste (less metallic) on the tongue. Add pasata to taste and a splosh of white wine and you're good to go. Less garlic for the reflux works too.
It works for me and I have gastric reflux with the iron rod red hot down the throat which I'm sure your hubs is familiar with. I used to take zantak which is an H2 receptor antagonist (stops acid production feedback), that worked for a while but now its pantoprazole (generic name) which is a proton pump inhibitor which is much much more effective all day than H2 antagonists. (quite old school now). The first generation proton pump inhibitors (PPI) had some heart rythm issues when used long term, the latter 2nd generation ones (pantoprazole) much less so. Neither of these medications is cheap if given on prescription long term and so some doctors allegedly would not necessarily prescribe them.
I really would give the beef tom a try it does work in reducing the acidity of the dish.
The Chillie and tomato mix is called Arabiata here.(CH)
M
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Many thanks I had forgotten how much I like doing them. Once you start it’s like an itch that has to be scratched.
M
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Here we go with Dinner on Ranworth Staithe, Easter Sunday plans and Roast beef. Nom Nom
After a very pleasant afternoon onboard the Corsican, Fiona and I trollied, sorry trundled, back to Malanka so we could get on with dinner. We decided that Roast Beef and Yorkshires was probably beyond our combined capabilities after an afternoon of totally rational and moderate drinking and so we made Spatchcock Chicken with Salt and Vinegar potato wedges with green beans instead, simples. Yes I noticed the obvious contradiction there too, I blame the Corsicans.
I made a last minute, unplanned plash and dash white wine sauce too, with some white wine, some flour and the chicken fat /juices which I just couldn’t throw away, the flavours of the seasoned chicken were all there to be used, so I used em. The chicken was so easy, remove packaging and place in pre heated oven and so on. The wedges were par boiled first (not peeled) and added to a hot roasting pan with some peanut oil then sprinkled with salt and vinegar seasoning and cooked for a further twenty minutes or so. Beans were just simple boiled French beans. The usual way we do French beans would have been with caramelised onions, garlic and bacon /panchetta was just too much fuss, and not really necessary as the chicken was to be the main event and star of the show. And in addition I really couldn’t be bothered.
Food consumed, wine sipped, after dinner Swiss liquor chocolates nibbled and washing up completed it was time to hit Bedfordshire once more. We then had a short debate concerning whose turn it was to “let the dogggies out for an ablution wander” so after I did that as well it was time for bed.
Next morning we awoke not to the sound of running engines but to ducks cavorting on the cabin tops. It was a pleasant surprise not to have heaters and engines running on Ranworth Staithe especially considering the state of the weather. The weather was calm but chilly and a slight drizzle threatening to get heavier any minute. After the mandatory dog walk and breakfast feed, Justin and I consulted with the rest of the crew and asked if they would like to leave the Staithe and go into the middle of the broad for breakfast, they all said, “oooh that’s a good plan”, as by now many engines and heaters were changing the Staithe ambience to one of busy with diesel fume parfum, so off we went.
So here was our situation, to our starboard side was a huge 42 feet long boat, to our port side a smaller 35 feet long cruiser and immediately in front was the yacht moored opposite the LHS of the staithe. In short there was no way to get Malanka out by turning to Starboard as she does not bend in the middle and the gap beteeen the yacht and the 42 feet long boat was not 39feet so no go there. So cunning plan devised we pulled up the mudweight, cast off the lines and gently moved away from the mooring and turned to port. Easily missing all boats and gently coasting down toward to end of the mooring, slight addition of a little reverse throttle and we then stopped, lined up the boat and proceeded to reverse back up the mooring, turn right in front of the moored boats (we are going backwards remember) on the front of the staithe, and then across the front of the staithe and then turn left at the end, neatly bisecting the two mudweighted boats in the process to arrive at the other side of the broad were Justin dropped the mudweight and we killed the engine and then quietly settled down to cook some happy Norfolk pig in various forms (bacon and sausage) and prepare some eggy bread / french toast cooked in savoury bacon and sausage fat /juice.
What better way to start the day in Malthouse Broad.
After breakfast our tentative plan was to pootle to Wroxham shoot the bridge and head up to Coltishall, hence the fairly early start, so we set off at a steady two donkey power in the direction of the bridge. Arriving at the height marker we saw 6ft 6’ on the guage and we can do 6ft6’ at a pinch so we decided that plan B was required and we could get back in the warm and not bother attempting the bridge and so we put everything back up. We had earlier just popped into Wroxham broad to take everything down and we were getting cold and wet in the process. Just as we decide to put it all back up of course the heavens opened and that bitter, bone numbing wind kicked in and we knew Easter Sunday was not going to be a pleasant day.
We looked at the forecast and thought that a nice slow pootle to the Ferry Inn at Stokesby would be a nice alternative day, so we set off with the open heavens pouring buckets down on norfolk and watched the rainX cope admirably with the incessant downpour. A couple of years earlier we had removed the twin windscreen wipers to go for the more authentic look and we now rely entirely on rainX to do the job for us. It works like a charm and the change gave us an extra 2 inches drop in air draft. We didn’t remove the nice internal dash fittings for the power though. This is now connected to a two speed Chrome windscreen fan kindly donated by one of my American colleagues who was going to fit it to his R.V. but never got round to it before selling the R.V. and so donated the fan to us. Roger the wood guy made us a lovely varnished wooden plinth for it to sit on, so it is totally moveable within the dash /windscreen area.
We had decided to fill up our tanks with Water at Southgates in Horning rather than Ranworth for obvious reasons (clean, quick and hose not dropped in the water and so on) as the following day we planned to cross Breydon and head up to Loddon early doors. However as with all things connected to plans, this soon went out of the window. On the way to Wroxham, the space was filled with multiple pump-out customers and even more waiting, so we kept going. On the return from Wroxham, the wind was blowing an absolute hooley and whilst I know what I am doing I did notice that the pontoon had less than six inches above the water, and our fenders don’t reach down that far. With the wind in that state the sensible thing to do would have been to deploy the floating huge white sausage fenders we have in the store up front. The even more sensible thing was to not attempt the move in the first place, as with wooden boats even a gentle “kiss” to a metal framed pontoon can have unexpetedly expensive consequences. We had only had two showers and some washing up out of the tanks so far and so we were good to go for a few days more if we wished. The weather on the journey to Stokesby was awful and so we just pootled, and enjoyed the journey listening to the gentle throb of the powerful 3.8l BMC power unit under our feet, and playing with the new fan to determine the best mist clearing location and fan speed combination.
Arriving at Stokesby we couldn’t believe our eyes, everyone was thinking the same as us and the place was chokka block with boats, the farm moorings double moored for a substantial part of their entire length. Luckily there was a single space left right outise the pub in front (up stream side) of a boat from Silverline. We have met Mr and Mrs Silverline and they are the nicest people you could wish to meet, we met them when we had an emergency (rocker cover oil cap gone walkies under the oil spill tray and into the bilges and so irretrievable), and these wonderful people enabled us to moor in their yard whilst we walked to the chandlers in Brundle to buy a new one, even though it was almost full and on a busy and very hot summers day. The Silerline boat was, as usual, immaculately turned out.
The tide was running downstream very quickly and so we passed the space, turned, added throttle and came about into the torrent that is created at the old crossing. The rest is easy, mooring into a heavy flowing river is one of my favourites as its so easy, you can just adjust the speed, turn the wheel and let the river take you sideways into the space with no effort required.
Mooring evolution completed we took stock and then Fiona and I headed into the pub. The pub was heaving from so many boats and the atmosphere was super. We met the biggest/tallest Irish Wolfhound Fiona and I had seen in many years and said hello, we then settled into a seat each at the bar to enjoy some “us time” in a pub by ourselves. We participated in the guess the number of chocolate eggs in a jar competition (didn’t win) and passed on information to the guys at the pub, from Malanka, sent via text as the weather was foul, that someone was attempting to moor and had in fact actually achieved it, stern on into the little gap on the downstream side of the Silerline boat. The guys from the pub went outside into the torrential rain to sort it out.
We spent a lovely afternoon chatting in the pub watching everyone have what looked to be a superb roast dinner, so much so that the pub ran out of Sunday Dinners. We love the Ferry Inn Stokesby and have never had anything but lovely experiences there. If you have never been try it out. It’s a lovely welcoming place inside and out, the staff are great too. Well done the Ferry Inn.
After watching all those dinners pass us by, the delicate aromas tantalising us as the plates were efficiently wafted past us destined for some hungry diners, it became too much and our thoughts turned to our own impending roast dinner abandonned from yesterday.
Fiona had purchased a superb piece of top rump from Cawdrons, and whilst not the cheapest option by far, we were anticipating eating a properly aged, well hung piece of beef cooked medium rare.
Accompanying this beautiful piece of ex very happy cow were to be yorkshire puddings (our first ever attempt on board in a camper oven). Fiona is the Yorkshire pudding Queen par excellence (remember the yorkshire pudding thread a while back), so her reputation was on the line….He he No pressure. Mashed potato (Helena’s favourite guilty pleasure at the moment), caramelised butter carrots, (No sugar just butter and time in the pan), and caramelised onion and red wine gravy (bit self explanatory that one)
We didn’t bother peeling the carrots to go into the gravy stock and couldn’t be bothered to buy celery as well so just onions and carrots were chopped, placed in pan with some butter, slightly seasoned and left to do their thing for the next 90 minutes. It was at this point we worked out we had forgotten to bring or buy a potato peeler, so taking life and limb (fingers) in hand so to speak, I peeled them using a short sharp knife. One stab wound later we had a pan ful of cut potato sitting in fresh cold water to come to full turgor pressure (firm up). Thickly cut but not peeled carrots were in a smaller pan with minimal water (which would go into the gravy later) and slightly seasoned. These would be cooked at the end so they didn’t sit and go yucky. The potato water along with a slosh of some decent red wine were also destined to be the liquid bulk of the gravy as well.
Beef into oven at max, we lost the numbers years ago so it’s just on at “hottest”, all the way round the dial ..Seasoned and on a roasting trivet. This piece of beef had a magnificent saddle of natural fat attached so I was looking forward to fully rendering that down, so that it bastes itself as it cooks. It’s also cooks privilege to eat it too. Nom nom. My HDL’s and LDL’s are fully aligned to deal with saturated fat so no worries there. Making a rue out of the fat and meat juices later would make magnificent gravy when added to the slowly roasted and caramelised onion and carrot components, and so it was (eventually).
Ok enough about cooking, it didn’t really matter how long it all took, as we were moored up with springs and having a lovely afternnon of joint family time chatting, talking and laughing together. It was a great end to a bad day weather wise but a great family day together.
Suffice it to say that the puddings took longer than anticipated but the flavour was extraordinary. Mingled with the gravy, (plus secret ingredient) carrots, mash and medium rare (pink) roast beef, the overall effect was magical. We did take pictures for Jeff but I can’t find them at the moment. The magic secret ingredient in the gravy when at home is plumb jam my mother made when we lived in Germany from a large plum tree we had in our garden (we left in Jan 2009), which now has matured and is simply amazing when used for cooking all sorts of different things. Here it was Roys Rasberry Jam.
Almost everything went to plan, but the stand out item was the beef which was stunning, tender as you like and cooked on gas mark guess for 15 mins/lb plus 15 mins. It was melt in your mouth good and in our opinion well worth the extra expense. We don’t eat roast beef that often but after this one we decided to go back to Cawdrons on the way home and buy 5 x 1kg joints to take back with us. That weight being the exact ammount the customs will let you import into CH with five pasport holders in the car. If we attempted to buy beef that good in Switzerland I would have to sell at least one child or a kidney at the very least.
We had a lovely eveing cooking, laughing and being a family together, Malanka brings us all back to earth and deposits us in a lovely location and it was great to spend the afternoon reconnecting and realising we do actually like each other too. We make each other laugh and what more can life be about.
We had an early, just after sunrise departure on Monday so it was early to Bedfordshire and it definitley was not my turn to parambulate with the woofters.
To come, Great Yarmouth, a lack of steerage, then Breydon and 11mph, full woo hoo. Later, Indian food in Loddon (Superb), highly recommended.
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Why CC you’re most very welcome for your gracious complement.
It of course does help that over ten tons, big rudder, huge torque and big prop, wind, all help, if used together in the right way.
I’m going to describe the showing off departure the next morning a bit later .
If you were there you saw Boris have a discussion with a pair of geese. He he he is such a dope.
M
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Loved it....
Lists, lists, everyone has to do a list , and then talk about it and imagine the holiday, the anticipation building, that's what lists are for. Anticipation.....
My lists used to (many many years ago) include pants x7 socks Pairs x7, jeans x2, shoes x2 and so on. Pre marriage I used to be ragged solid by the now SWIMBO about my so detailed lists. One year quite recently she forgot my pants and my shorts.... grrr lists indeed. We now pack separately.
Excellent holiday tale.
M&F
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Malanka Tales
in Holiday Tales & Blogs
Posted
Easter Monday dawned, which is about the best and only good thing one can actually say about that morning, ok it wasn’t cats and dogs outside, it wasn’t blowing a hooley either, it was dull , dull with some extra dull thrown in for those who needed more dull. Oh and it was drizzling too. It was also 6 am. The sounds of reluctant wakers and even more reluctant dog perambulators (I just miss typed god for dog there… HHHmmm very interesting) shuffling about the place staying warm and not turning on the lights (it was still fairly dark as I didn’t want to lose my night vision) was a quiet and controlled contrast to the total silence outside, not even the ducks were quacking it was that dull.
Fiona and Justin took the woofers out for their morning mad ten minutes, even the dogs knew it was dull and didn’t bark or do silly stuff. Anyone with any Airedale experience knows how rare this is.
I turned on the wheel house red light to look for shoes and gps and stuff like that. I also turned on the boat nav lights because as I may have mentioned it was a bit dull like outside.
( just as a complete aside. The farmer who rents our spare development land as a farm here in Switzerland has been spreading natural fertiliser on the fields. My window is open as here in CH office Air con without very good reason is not permitted and as I type this in my lunch time I do so with the amazing piquant aroma of rural natural poo wafting about my nostrils)
I also removed the springs we customarily deploy in the more tidal or free flowing areas of the broads. I brought back on board the deployable white sausage fenders we use when the need arises as our fenders may be too high. They were piled onto the bow of the boat and all tied together to get a bit of a washing if we managed to get up a decent speed across Breydon later. Soggy wet canines and hoomans returned to the boat it was time to depart which isnt as easy as it sounds. We were only 3 ft or so from the stern of the Silverline boat behind and the flow was very strongly in that direction. We had bow and stern lines remaining and I wanted to make use of the current to push us out. Justin shortened the stern line, I let the bow line go and got back on board pretty sharpish, then as the bow came out pivoting on the stern line justin cast it off and I added thrust at the same time and away we were. Minimum fuss and disruption to our neighbours.
The interesting thing about this stretch of river is the speed with which it flows, even on 650 revs which is normally 3-3.5 mph we were clipping along barely straight at 6 mph, leaving not a ripple in the water and with very little steerage, in my opinion further evidence if any were needed that speed limits need to be enforced as “generated wash limits” if, as the authorities claim the limits are for bank erosion protection reasons. Speed over the ground means nothing in these circumstances other than the time to destination tables are less useful. We didn’t want to arrive too early nor too late as basically we didn’t want to drop the top and also then get caught in the flow the other side, so it’s a delicate balance, using slack passage generally results in us dropping the top. It was cold and wet and did I say DULL, so no top dropping please.
We made it all the way down to Marina Quays before we found more boats actually moving, then there were two following each other with barely enough speed to generate steerage and we were not in a position to pass them as they were both taking the short route and I didn’t fancy finding out what new delights were littering the shallow zones at either side of the river into Yarmouth. A few years ago we had the prop on Malanka balanced properly which took the guys way longer than they anticpated as someone at some point had hit something so hard as to bend and dent two blades of the 17inch brass prop we are fitted with. She was so much smoother afterwards I am reluctant to even risk hitting anything under the water so behind them we stayed swaying from side to side in the flow. Eventually I had enough of this and after name calling and other venting activities didn’t work. I simply stopped in the river engaged reverse for five minutes and let them go do their thing slowly and carefully (or so they obviously thought they were doing), I’m still not convinced they didn’t actually know they werent actually steering.
Anyway five minutes of holding station (OK I turned round to make it easier) off we went round the corner into Yarmouth with Justin deployed on the bow to scout the height guage. We should not have worried as the first guage read well over 9ft. So off we went with confidence with revs set for 4 mph to give us the steerage we needed. We waved to the rangers at the yacht station which was actually packed with boats and then looked ahead, somehow the boats we had been following and had thought we had escaped were there just going into the arrows for the first bridge, how was this possible? I will never know but it was the case. No option to turn here so I tried as best as I could to stay straight in the river and go as slowly as I possibly could. We negotiated both bridges easily but were now approaching the incredibly slow boats in front, how they were steering I have no idea. Last bit to go down to the yellow post and I could see the torrent of water that was flowing by the post and we hung back best we could whilst the two boats in front were jostled about from here to there in the quickly flowing water. Past the post and we let her have her head in the fast flow, she quickly accerated and we moved to the left to pass both boats as they had clung remorselessly to the far right side and were very close to the yellow post itself which I’m sure we all agree is never that good an idea. The two boats were still not steering all that well and floundering a bit so we continued past before we went under the bridge. Between the huge concrete stantions, there was an absolute waterfall of water coming down from the bridge which splattered the boat like a shower gel advertisement, it was a bit cold for the scantily clad blonde but you get the idea.
Trip across Breydon was great fun, everything one could ask for, wind, waves and a crashing bow wave cleaning the fenders. I did take a picture of the gps speed but it’s a bit of a cheat as we were with the flow. 11mph is fun…..
Soon enough the turn for Burgh Castle hove into view and we reduced speed to a steady plod and headed up the river against the tide, there were a few boats moored and a few people out and about on the top of the quayheading, the drop down to the boats was quiet significant and it looked like for a few boats the roof access was the only option. Reedham came and went with the only excitement being taking down the masty thing which I had to do whilst the crew recovered from their early start with an extended lie in. Suffice it to say that the brass monkey returned minus a few items after putting the mast down and then up again. Only a few boats at Reedham, where I am afraid to say we no longer stay. The reason being we can’t afford to have all the repairs done that staying there inevitably results in, simple as that. Reedham Ferry came and went and that is somewhere I would like to stay soon.
We reached the turn for the chet before 9 am and headed slowly down one of the most lovely parts of the system, we saw only two other boats both leaving for at least half an hour and then I glanced back to see a woodie behind doing the same as us. Remarkably there were no swans, geese, or ducks anywhere to be see on the flood which due to the rain was really flooded. We continued up the river and passed Pyes Mill mooring and only one or two boats there too. Heading slowly into the marina and there were roughly four or five spare berths and lots of people moving about and it looked quite a bustling little early morning scene. Slipping stern on into a berth we tied up and relaxed, not knowing what dramas were to happen later but mainly discussing what we were going to do for food later that same evening. We had cooked twice and we didn’t fancy doing it again so we ummed and aahhhed about pub (with dogs) or chips (had them Thursday) or chinese (had that Friday), eventually we decided on Indian as we know the indian in Loddon is superb. Indian it was.
We had plugged into the electic with 78 pence on the post and we had lashings of hot water after our Breydon adventure so I decided to have a long and very luxurious shower, not even turning the water off to use the shower gel. How decadent is that….
With steam emerging from both bathroom side windows, it must have looked like Malanka was vaping or something. Resisting the urge to sing in the shower I washed dried and emerged refreshed and eager to do nothing but read my book and watch the world go by. Unfortunately this wasn’t going to happen.
I was sitting in the wheelhouse reading and relaxing when I heard engine sounds and looked up to see a broadlander (we have the number) coming into the marina, I had no worries as this type of boat is equiped with every thruster going and is a very manouvrable boat. Justin and I went on deck to help and take a line to make things easier. Unfortunately the helm decided that thrusters were for other people and either;
Didn’t know how to
Want to use them
so he didn’t, as it turns out he was also of the max revs for mooring fraternity and the little Broadlander was swinging back and forth at the stern like a peeed off windsock, rather close to our port side bow. Whoooaaa I shouted just as they were about to connect, thrust was added and they pulled away, only to return thirty seconds later (or so it seemed) at a much increased speed and slammed straight into the port side bow area with a cracking impact almost knocking Fiona and Helena who was holding Eliza - 6 months old, off their feet. I may have said something about the son of our lord at this point but suffice it to say I was a tad miffed. The helm used the bounce off us to then head backwards and lift every fender down the side of the boat and actually get close to the quay heading., where he sprang out of the stern and grabbed lines to tie up. I was at point this calmly remarking to him that in fact he couldn’t moor there as there are no mooring posts which was why nobody else was in the hole, it wasn’t the first time I had told him this. Whilst I was telling him this he was busy attaching a rope to left hand leg of the BA sign behind the mooring. I Pointed out that would be a huge trip hazard in the dark and prevent anyone with a wheelchair or a push chair from moving down the mooring area. I also don’t think the ranger in the area would be awfully impressed either. Its not like there werent many spaces available, there were many.
I enquired of the mooring miscreant if his boat had thrusters to which he replaied that it did. “Why didn’t you use them to prevent hitting us I asked”. His immediate response is a classic of entitlement. “look, not everyione is experienced you know, I’m a beginner” he said. “And that prevents you from using the thrusters with which your boat is equiped precisely to avoid such situations, why exactly” I asked. Also “why does being a beginner remove your responsibility for hitting us a massive blow” I asked, “you almost knocked my wife, daughter, and baby grand daughter off their feet” I added by way of extra detail. “Look mate I’m a beginner and I’m sorry but it was only a tap” he replied. This inability to apologise for the incident without adding and its not my fault is classic, and also then saying it doesn’t matter anyway as its only a “tap” beggars belief, or would have done if I had not encountered such individuals (insert your own favourite epithet for such people here) many times in the past. I ask you to insert your own word as my usual ones are not welcome in this place, as they have been referred to as “potentially insulting” by some. Well no sugar in your tea sherlock, insulting is sometimes required, necessary and appropriate to convey the totally vaccuous nature of this man’s responses. So choose your own my conscience is clear.
This miscreant seemed to me to be a “not listening, obfuscating, dissonant denier” type and so any remonstration I came up with would fall on deaf ears and very probably antagonise him. He was entitled to hit my boat and cause quite significant damage because in his own words, he was an “inexperienced beginner” and so it’s OK.
I wonder how this would have played out in reverse in the car park of his local supermarket had I accidentally crashed into the side of his car scratching down the entire length and denting the front left panel, I’m not sure sorry I’m a beginner would work?
The damage was through the paint and into the wood with a depresssion of about ¾ of a cm and length of about 15 cm. Hardly a tap.
Anyway I swallowed all that and said we (justin and I ) could move him using ropes to the mooring on the opposite side of us, where there were adequate posts to secure his boat. “How are you going to do that “ he asked, “with ropes I replied”. OK I sighed but not that much…..
So Justin and I then had him pass us his ropes and we pulled the boat out of the mooring and out in front of Malanka, a little bit of heaving and we got him to the other side and heading for the quay heading. All good I hear you say to your collectives selves, and so we also thought.
Suddenly with both Justin and I standing on the staboard decking of Malanka with tight mooring lines to the stern of the broadlander, it suddenly accelerated forwards, almost pulling both Justin and I into the freezing cold March water it was so sudden, we had no options other than to drop the ropes into the water.
The miscreant then appears at the stern of the Broadlander and yells, “F this I’m F’ing P****d off here”, and then proceeds to gather up his lines and head off to Pyes mill. Well there you go….
A little while later a blue bathtub type boat appears and skillfully moors next to us with minimal help from us just taking the proferred lines as requested by the crew. “Thank you” I said “that’s so much nicer than the previous chap who was rather rude”. “Ahh” he said “that will be my little brother he is an arrogant pr*ck and a total d*ckh**d as well”. Who was I to argue?
Just as Justin and I were settling back to wheelhouse book reading a huge, brand new, first trip out Fair Entrepreneur slowly entered the marina and promptly stopped dead in the water. Their engine had cut out, they continued to head for the outflow that usually trickes down into the basin , but on this occasion it was a raging torrent that was quite audible in its ferocity. We exchanged some words and I asked if they had thrusters they said yes but no engine, I replied that the trusters should still work for a while, which actually was the case. So with minimal use of thrusters they managed to avoid everyone and just sort of sit there in Limbo.
We attempted from the bow of Malanka to throw them two lines joined together, but the distance was too great and once wet it effectively got even further. Justin then commandered the blue bathtub’s rowing dinghy and took the two joined lines via the dinghy to the boat. OK it took longer than that and was a real effort but he did it.
Then it was a matter of heaving and pulling and grunting to get this leviathan into a mooring space next to us. Suffice it to say we managed it. The hirer called NBD and they promised to come out early doors next day to fix the issue.
After all this excitement it was time for our take away from the Indian on the high street and we ran over to get an updated menu. We perused, decided, ordered and picked up a delicious meal in less than 30 minutes. Try them its superb.
After our meal, we perambulated with the woofters, enjoyed some saloon talk and then redied oursleves for bed as we were tired. An early start followed by a morning, then afternoon of stress and drama, and we come away to relax????
Tomorrow we were heading to Rockland St mary to meet up with Alex and Lorna and eat out with the woofters in the New Inn. It’s only a short trip but todays excitement meant we needed a relaxing day doing nowt….
More to come.
Attached is the picture of the GPS we took crossing Breydon. Was mucho fun. We didn't get much opportunity to take pictures of the other exciting events that happened in Loddon, but we did get boat number of the miscreants boat. Deciding what to do with it now.