The World According To Mr Runner

Baitrunner · January 20, 2017

Apologises to anyone of a religious belief

no offence meant

Well I am on the cusp of yet another annual reminder that the belly is getting bigger, the bladder weaker and the years shorter. Yes happy birthday to me for tomorrow.

So friday night is my night

In the beginning the lord said all men shall cook on fire. Cooking on other products shall be against the lords will. Gas of the calor and camping shall not count gas of other sorts shall be accepted as an after product

In order to please the lord though shalt purchase a lodge for the cooking of beasts and vegetables, if said beasts are in short supply or you have to cook for weirdos!

the lodge shall be used when the weather is *king cold

so being of loyal blood I shall comply

the lodge was purchased and the fire was lit as it was *kin cold

And the lord he was joyous as was the Runner

the temperature quickly rose from a very chilly 3 deg to a massive and immensely impressive 38 c

Mrs Runner was duly impressed (well slightly) and soon joined the boss (ok artistic licence there)

by now a major problem had arisen how does one keep the lords wine cold.

Well the lord shall provide. And he did. The pond was frozen and the wine was chilled. Praise the god of ice!!! That's the wine on the pond!!!

The Runner he shall cook and maybe cremate some meat. (Yes even i get it wrong sometimes).

But the mrs runner she will enjoy and covet thine meat (I exaggerated that bit again).

Meat and salad like "stuff" was consumed and the world it was happy and joyous. Mainly due to alcohol imbibement.

The morale is. However burnt or shrivelled your meat, with enough alcohol you can still be a king.

And no gas needed. But maybe some created!!

have a lovely weekend and I shall be celebrating yet another year on planet earth tomorrow. They said it would never happen. dont listen to the voices in your head. Will power can overcome the beast called life!!!!