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Some light humour......


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which seems needed with all the horrible news lately......




Observations on Growing Older

· Your kids are becoming you...

and you don't like them...

but your grandchildren are perfect!

* Going out is good...

Coming home is better!

* When people say you look great, they add "for your age!"

* When you needed the discount, you paid full price.

Now you get discounts on everything... movies, hotels, flights,

but you're too tired to use them.

* You forget names....

but it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!!!

* The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have a better chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.

* You realize you're never going to be really good at anything....especially golf.

* Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.

* The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do, but you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.

* Your spouse sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than he or she does in bed. It's called their "pre-sleep".

* Remember when your mother said,

"Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"?

Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!

* You used to say, "I hope my kids GET married"...

Now, "I hope they STAY married!"

* You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch.

* When GOOGLE, ipod, email, modem were unheard of, and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.

* You tend to use more 4 letter words ...

"what?"..."when?"... ???

* Now that you can afford expensive jewellery, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.

* Your husband/wife has a night out with the guys or gals but is home by 9:00 P.M. Next week it will be 8:30 P.M.

* You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.

* Notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!

* What used to be freckles are now liver spots.

* Everybody whispers.

· Now that your spouse has retired .....

you'd give anything if he/she would find a job!

* You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet ...

2 of which you will never wear.

* But old is good in some things:

old songs,

old movies,

And best of all, OLD FRIENDS!!

It's Not What You Gather, But What You Scatter That Tells What Kind Of Life You Have Lived

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