Just seen this

[Gracie]

Awe, love the Donkeys with their little pink socks, so cute  As for the Boots, I own a couple of Boots, I just wish they were Centre Cockpit Norfolk types and not the ones you wear on your feet lol

Grace

[JennyMorgan]

3 hours ago, Poppy said:

A couple of 'Essex' donkeys...

And there was me thinking that an Essex donkey's more usual ankle warmers looked suspiciously like Primart or Matalan knickers! 

[BroadScot]

1 hour ago, JennyMorgan said:

And there was me thinking that an Essex donkey's more usual ankle warmers looked suspiciously like Primart or Matalan knickers! 

Awe JM, I always had a gent like you down for Moss Bros or Saville Row! For ALL forms of your dress attire!

Iain

[SPEEDTRIPLE]

 There always used to be a pub on the riverbank at Tilbury called "The  Worlds End"...................enough said.

Why do i think there`s going to be a plethora of "Essex Girl" jokes?.

OK, i`l start with one,

Q  What do you call a 15 stone Tilbury Girl?.

A  Annorexic

[JennyMorgan]

2 hours ago, SPEEDTRIPLE said:

Q  What do you call a 15 stone Tilbury Girl?.

A  Annorexic

Sounds more like a Yarmouth Girl joke!

[BroadScot]

17 minutes ago, JennyMorgan said:

Sounds more like a Yarmouth Girl joke!

Removed duplicate JM. 

[Baitrunner]

Q how can you tell when an Essex girl has an orgasm?

A she drops her crisps!

[JennyMorgan]

27 minutes ago, Baitrunner said:

Q how can you tell when an Essex girl has an orgasm?

A she drops her crisps!

If she'd been a Yarmouth Girl then she would have dropped her bag of soggy chips from the Market!

[Poppy]

What does an Essex girl use for protection when she has sex?

 

Any convenient bus shelter ......

[Poppy]

What's the difference between a Walrus and an Essex Girl?

One is wet, has a moustache and smells of fish - the other is a walrus.

[Poppy]

Warning - never let Essex girls take coffee breaks.

 

It takes too long to retrain them.

[Hockham Admiral]

18 hours ago, Poppy said:

Drink does that to people..

     

Just Beautiful, Pops!

[Gracie]

Sorry peeps, I know I'm not a Mod but perhaps we should be careful not to offend anyone, I know our Jean is an Essex girl, don't forget we are in open Forum...........having said that........Did you hear about the Essex girl that had a pet Zebra, she named him Spot 

Anyone reading this from Essex, please do not take offence, the Forumites responsible really mean no harm, just an attempt at a sense of humour and failing miserably lol  and you will be hard pressed to find a nicer bunch of people 

Grace

[Hylander]

Hey Ho and all that -  I suppose someone has to stick their head above the parapet and say - oi you lot I am an Essex girl, born in Theydon Bois Essex.     I can be at times as thick or as bright as the next person but take offence - no.   Really gave me a good laugh.

 

Life is too short to be miserable.

 

 

[BroadScot]

1 minute ago, Hylander said:

Hey Ho and all that -  I suppose someone has to stick their head above the parapet and say - oi you lot I am an Essex girl, born in Theydon Bois Essex.     I can be at times as thick or as bright as the next person but take offence - no.   Really gave me a good laugh.

 

Life is too short to be miserable.

 

 

Well said Monica That's put that Sussex wench in her place! 

Iain.

[JawsOrca]

Gracie.. I think people from essex are well used to these jokes. But of course you are right.. this is just typical NBN bad humor and no offence intended.. if anyone is offended (to this or anything) please click the report button and we can action accordingly.

I notice there are no negative views of us Kentish folk so it really must be the best county in the UK.. 

(P.s ..Gracie for mod..)

[Gracie]

Well, you try and be nice and that's what you get  I'll have you know, I am a Wench from Sussex and proud, but slightly dim (slightly I said) as I was under the impression that with a user name like Hylander, our Monica was one of you lot from Scotland, I stand corrected and good on you, M  Maybe we should form a Forum of our own, Essex and Sussex Girls Unite, or some such, we could talk spray tans, shoes and everything lol

Grace

p.s Just seen your post Jaws, I am now looking for jokes about people from Kent (here we go again lol) 

[BroadScot]

4 minutes ago, JawsOrca said:

Gracie.. I think people from essex are well used to these jokes. But of course you are right.. this is just typical NBN bad humor and no offence intended.. if anyone is offended (to this or anything) please click the report button and we can action accordingly.

I notice there are no negative views of us Kentish folk so it really must be the best county in the UK.. 

(P.s ..Gracie for mod..)

Alan!!! Team meetings would be nothing but discussions on what are the next pair of shoes Gracie is going to buy ! Oh dear oh dear. 

 

Iain.

[JawsOrca]

Just now, BroadScot said:

Alan!!! Team meetings would be nothing but discussions on what are the next pair of shoes Gracie is going to buy ! Oh dear oh dear. 

 

Iain.

Aren't they that already

 

[BroadScot]

I have always thought the word Kent was a SCOT's word, meaning well known, never thought of it as a county!  

Iain

[JennyMorgan]

Perhaps a forum for Essex Man would be good too. Somewhere to chat about white trainers and bling . . . . . . . . 

Coincidentally we have have a new postman. short, gabby bloke, wears white socks too, just moved up here from Essex. Still wearing shorts, in this weather!

[BroadScot]

JM, I think its compulsory now that all Posties do their rounds with shorts on! Either that, or our Postie is from Essex also!   A hardy breed indeed!

Iain.

 

 

[MauriceMynah]

Nuffin rong wiv wite socks!

[JennyMorgan]

No wot yew meen, Jon!

[Hylander]

no negative views of us Kentish folk

Oh I am sure we can think of a few , having lived in Kent for over 40 years prior to moving up to sanity in Suffolk I will try and think of a few.

Now to make matters worse ,  I forgot to throw into the mix that I am also of Irish decent.     Really I stand no chance.

 

M