Wussername

AhaJokes.com is proud to present... How to Cook a Turkey... Happy Christmas to you all. Step 1: Go buy a turkey Turkey Dinner Step 2: Take a drink of whiskey, scotch, or JD Step 3: Put turkey in the oven Step 4: Take another 2 drinks of whiskey Step 5: Set the degree at 375 ovens Cup of Beer Step 6: Take 3 more whiskeys of drink Step 7: Turn oven the on Step 8: Take 4 whisks of drinky Step 9: Turk the bastey Alcoholic Beverage Step 10: Whiskey another bottle of get Step 11: Stick a turkey in the thermometer Step 12: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey Step 13: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours Bottle of Wine Step 14: Take the oven out of the turkey Step 15: Take the oven out of the turkey Step 16: Floor the turkey up off the pick Step 17: Turk the carvey Turkey Dinner Step 18: Get yourself another scottle of botch Step 19: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey Step 20: Bless the saying, pass and eat out! Old Wussername

Manko Please share your postcards and photographs. Thorpe St Andrew was considered The Garden of Norfolk in time gone past. Every year I place a wreath on my parents grave, in the parish church. I always walk along the village green. This year it was an absolute delight to see that the residents on the other side of the river have transformed the area into what has become a most desirable place to live on the river. Commander Ashby, I think, would be well pleased. Old Wussername.

You Know You Are Getting Old When... You recognise yourself on one of Jenny Morgan's postcards. Old Wussername

Yes, I remember now, you are absolutely correct. I don't know why, but seeing the amount of water the bow pushed in front of it it seemed logical to my confused thinking that the water drained from the dykes after the coaster passed in order to replace that which had been carried in front of the vessel. Old Wussername. It is quite late now, I'll post this in the morning. Best wind the cat up and put the clock out!

W-Album Was the water coming out of the dykes before the coaster or after? Old Wussername -

I am sure that I can remember a coaster called the Molly M, or am I mistaken. Holiday makers were told not to moor on bends, certainly round the Whitlingham area. Talking of which, on several occasions they would ground on a bend, and I can remember a great wall of water that they pushed before them, and in their wake water would drain from the river , dykes and tributaries of the river Yare. Old Wussername.

Well I for one did not understand any of that old malarkey, load of old squit! Now as a failed Captain of Industry, and mindful that the intelligently amongst us, the movers and the shakers, are in the process of producing a new forum format. Have they asked us mere mortals that wot we would like. Have they heck! We are going to be up the creek without the proverbial. Scuppered me old ship mates. Fetched up on a lee shore. Wot we need me old hearties is a button, which when pressed, brings up a spread sheet, headed up, PENSION PROJECTION. This will solve that age old problem "You're not on that bl***y forum again?" With confidence reply "just keeping an eye on our future darling" Old Wussername.

Great to "sea" you on this forum. I am sure that you will be made very welcome. Old Wussername.

Interesting to note that there were some 20 ferries on the River Yare. Mostly foot or one man and his boat.http://www.broadlandmemories.co.uk/blog/2014/02/crossing-the-yare-buckenham-ferry/ Great to see these old photographs JM. Not so good is that some that you have posted (not this present batch, I hasten to add) I can remember!!

Iain Make sure that your kilt is weighted down Old Wussername

JM Let us know how you get on boy! When it's in the West, fishin at it'best In the East, not fit for man or beast. Lookout it might turn me old mucker! Old Wussername

JM I do hope that the members bare with us whilst us old curmudgeons reminisce. The former I certainly relate too. You may remember the latter.☺ Today, the only change is that on the voyage to the lock, having passed Beccles, prior to the arrival, the wherry has to lower it's mast. Why? Because of the power lines, which it passes underneath. Not that it would touch the lines, but it is deemed by those who understand these matters, to be to close. That is the only consideration or requirement to our modern world that is I suspect the only change that has been made for generations. Old Wussername

I remember it well. All those years past. And do you know, very little has changed. To travel through Beccles to Geldeston lock even to this day, is going back in time. What you see, that which you experience, was appreciated by many before us. Old Wussername

JM You have failed to mention the Norfolk Long Drop. I remember well visiting a meeting in Mundsley the village hall, some years past. A visitor enquired where the toilet was. A local replied " down the path, rite at the end there be a green door. In a little hut! Mind how you go. On his return he said " How did yer git on boy" "Very well old man, thank you very much, but I have to tell you there was no lock on the door. " Dunt you worry about that me old mucker, we int have any on it nicked yet! Old Wussername

We would also need a mate and a turd Officer!

Who do you think, from the forum, would make a good captain for such a vessel.

I think that my mother in law has got a scarf like that! She smells a bit. But a heart of gold. A heart of gold. Old Wussername

I think that I am correct in saying that the majority of hire boat company's,if not all of them, provide a waste disposal facility for their customers, and indeed the facility could well be extended to other visiting hire craft. With regard to the company's that provide moorings for large numbers of private craft, situated throughout the broads, do they provide a waste disposal facility for their customers or are they expected to take their rubbish home, or make other arrangements? Old Wussername

I heard from a commercial driver, a trucker that uses the A11 every night that the road is finished. It is complete. It could be open tomorrow. But it will not happen. It is a contractual matter. Who is financially responsible for the road. Damage caused by storm, subsidence, an act of god, who knows? The actual hand over date, agreed by all parties is all important, not least of which is insurance. Material and public. It is then, and only then will it be open to the public. Until that time you will have to conform to the delays and speed limits that are in place. Old Wussername

Today is the first day of winter. Those lazy hazy days of summer seem in the far distant past. Hours at the helm, albeit tiller or wheel. I know that our good ladies, bless them, are more than capable of this onerous task, but some, not all, are challenged, a bit like map reading and stern on mooring. This is where us boys step up to the mark. However we are well rewarded. Our little treasures, at the end of the day know how to spoil us. A well deserved treat. A swifty livener, a tonsil rinse. A little G & T or a glass of Chateau Algerian Wunder 2013 ( you wonder what the hell you are drinking. Where are the blackcurrant and raspberry flavours mentioned on the label? Certainly not in your bottle!) However, come winter matters have taken a turn for the worst Mrs Wussername has now decreed that we should share the wine………………..half each. There is an ulterior motive. It is to curtail my intake. She does not even like red wine, but seems to manage at least three glasses a night. In our hall, dear old Grandma’s aspidistra has languished for many years, neglected, deprived, ignored, however, we did promise to care for it……..well sort off. I have noticed that the wretched thing has started to perk up, the leaves are definitely shinier. Should I be concerned? Old Wussername

Not a falling in tale, however, a true incident, involving a holiday boat hirer. I met him some years ago now, on a boat yard. He was just about to depart on his holiday, and as a local, we talked about where to go, what to see, what to do. I think that he appreciated my advice. I wished him well and the last I saw him on that day he was tacking his way down the river Ant. In a motor cruiser! I met him the following week. What a coincidence. He was pleased to see me. I could not help but notice that he had a very large bump right in the middle of his forehead. It was the size of, half a size, class A extra large EGG. "My word" I said. " What ever have you done" Well he said. " I bumped into Potter Heigham Bridge! "Oh" I said. "Quite a big bit of kit, did you not see it"? "Oh yes, I saw it all-right, It was through my video camera, recording the memorable moment of going through the bridge. Unfortunately it was on zoom, so I lost all perception of distance." "And I hit the bridge" Old Wussername.

Do many members of the forum use Tapatalk ? Are there any advantages ? Old Wussername

How many locks are there on the broads? Oulton Broad, Geldeston, Coltishall,Honing. I am sure that there must be more. Who used them? The wherry men?

There has to be a market for a publication that is aimed at the practical boater, both motor and sail, covering mini-projects, seasonal tips, informative articles on places of interest, boatyard blogs, local history, exploration of little-known waterways and reviews of new and used boats to name but a few. You are in luck Steve. It's called the NBN.

Have you noticed that, when ever you help someone to make fast a boat to a mooring, irrespective how perfect your knot, how exact, how fit for purpose, it will, without fail be undone, and replaced by the owner of the boat by his knot. Old Wussername