As a former English teacher, of the not overpaid variety, I spent half my life correcting the errors we have mentioned. I did derive a lot of enjoyment from the 'he goes/she goes' (said) expression. I would be receiving a long complaint about some contretemps or other, and would ask 'Where?' when this was used, to the bewilderment of the complainant. 'Where did he/she go?'
'Nowhere, Miss.'
'Oh you mean said.'
It used to interrupt the flow beautifully, and I got a grammar point across into the bargain. Evil.