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Ladies, Am I Allowed To Smirk?


Timbo

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We live in a world of 'political correctness'. As a well mannered bloke I seem to be getting it in the neck from all directions these days. If I don't open a door for a lady I'm 'rude'. If I do open the door 'I'm sexist'. If I do open the door, get called 'sexist' and then let the door swing back then apparently I 'feel my masculinity is being threatened'.

But just exactly how are blokes supposed to respond to female fashions? I do my best to be helpful, of course, and anticipate questions often saying 'those make your bum look big' before being asked. I once gave what I thought was sound practical advice to my daughter who was preparing to go out covered in fake tan, wearing a purple dress with what looked like a greenish tinge to her hair. Apparently commenting 'you look like a bloody Oompah Lumpa' is not deemed to be 'constructive'.

So what reaction am I supposed to give to the current female fashion in eyebrows? Last night I was confronted by a number of young women all sporting eyebrows that seemed to have been drawn on in thick marker pen by an inebriated one eyed child. It was like a 'Mrs Potato Head' convention. None of the eyebrows matched, one poor soul seemed to have just drawn them on her forehead, while another seemed to have one brow sliding off round the side of her head in search of lettuce. If they were going for a 'quizzical, confused, slapped in the face with a wet fish while sitting on a cattle prod look' then they had succeeded. All I could think of was Baldric's slug balancing act! But it didn't stop there. I saw a report on the BBC concerning the England Ladies Rugby Team who all seemed normal enough young women except for the 'silent movie villain' eyebrows. Then there was the two GB female athletes all very successful but interviewed after the race they looked like they had just finished running after being chased by the Keystone Cops for strapping some damsel to the railway lines. So what gives with the eyebrows? Am I allowed to smirk? A quick chuckle? Possibly comment?

 

 

 

 

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The infamous HD brow. When my wife sports the look I simply smile which she takes to mean they look good, not knowing the smile is from me laughing on the inside trying not to let the chuckle out. :naughty: My advice, never make a direct comment, give vague cryptic responses. Branden :D

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Fashion experts ( and I use the term loosely) are constantly looking for some aspect to focus on to justify their existence and at the moment it seems eyebrows are the thing to concentrate on. Most of us females look on this  fixation as what it is -  a load of tosh. But those of us  who mistakenly think we need advice on how to dress, make up,  etc are grist their mill. I wouldn't  mind so much but often  when you see a photo of these self appointed gurus they look an absolute fright, so where do they get the notion thinking they can advise the rest of us? "Physician heal thyself" comes to mind.

 

 

Carole

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The thing is as we have generally become wealthier there is a growing need to find something to spend all that wealth on.

As a youth my parents aspiration was to one day buy a tv, a fridge, a washing machine and just maybe to have a telephone.

It is sad when you see attractive people turning themselves into freek shows, at great expence, by the plastic cosmetic surgeons and I can only guess that they must see something completely different in the mirror to what I observe.

Back to the topic of wayward eyebrows ............

If they look silly I will inwardly giggle but I wouldn't be so bold as to share those thoughts with the person concerned. My children have successfully pursuaded me that anything I say, do or think is complete b***ocks.

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I very much think you're allowed to smirk Timbo, I absolutely don't understand that look, what I also can't understand for the life of me why the girls of my generation have to send selfies pouting which only succeeds in making them look like constipated ducks :naughty:Apparently biting your lip is also sexy I sent a photo to im indoors of me biting my lip once, it didn't go down too well, apparently it's your bottom lip you're supposed to bite :facepalm:(not a good look, I can tell you)

Grace

 

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On 18/03/2017 at 4:31 PM, Gracie said:

I very much think you're allowed to smirk Timbo, I absolutely don't understand that look, what I also can't understand for the life of me why the girls of my generation have to send selfies pouting which only succeeds in making them look like constipated ducks :naughty:Apparently biting your lip is also sexy I sent a photo to im indoors of me biting my lip once, it didn't go down too well, apparently it's your bottom lip you're supposed to bite :facepalm:(not a good look, I can tell you)

Grace

 

what i find aweful gracie , is when people stick their tongues out & they have a stud in it, ouch,  it looks painful, lori

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True story...

On a Saturday lunchtime I would frequent the local pub with a number of other regulars...just having a 'wet' and a natter before nipping home and getting showered and changed for the evening session. The subject of discussion was piercings, as one bloke's daughter had gone and got her tongue pierced and he was quite livid about it. The conversation moved on to what piercings we blokes had between us. A pretty conservative lot we boasted one nipple and three ear piercings. Then little Jimmy pipes up. Jimmy was in his late twenties, certainly not one of the brightest and was known by the nickname of 'Juanita' as he only had one tooth in his head.
"I've got a piercing.' said Jimmy.
"Oh aye? What you got pierced?' we asked.
"It's in me wotsit?" said Jimmy. 
"What wotsit?" one of us asked.
"I've got one in me todger!" said Jimmy.
"What have you got in yer todger Juanita?" asked Old Frank who'd just got back from the gents.
"I've got a King Edward!" said Jimmy proudly.
"I think you mean a Prince Albert." said Frank "'Cos the other's a bloody potato!"

 

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8 hours ago, loribear said:

what i find aweful gracie , is when people stick their tongues out & they have a stud in it, ouch,  it looks painful, lori

Lori why do you think they stick their tongue out then........

In the hope some one takes it out to relieve their pain, but no one ever does poor things. What some people do to be different aye............... me ive got ..........................................................................................

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That made yer scroll down to see roflmao

Charlie

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