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Posted

A while back I decided that I had enough , however in hindsight I feel that I might well have acted in haste , its pretty obvious I'm still active anyway so I figured I best explain things  .

Basically I got rather fed up mostly because I felt it didn't matter what the subject was or what I said I would face the same opposing posts , not that I mind a bit of banter but constantly it wears yiu down n to be honest I lost confidence in posting , that returned after a while and I started posting again only to be shot down once more for no reason other than I hadn't explained that I hadn't left .

Anyway cutting a long story short I'm after a lot of discussion with various people stopping right here. Now I know of late there's been the words unfriendly forum used but I don't see it like that at all , realising that not everyone will agree with you all the time is important to know as is seeing the other side of the coin .

So I hope you'll forgive me for my moment of madness and thanks to everyone for your kind words in  the original thread .

Oh BTW a couple of member's asked a long time ago if I could do a thread on the alternative life style of living onboard , having thought about it dismissed it thought about it more iv decided wat the heck why not , my intention is not to say this is how you do it n the rest is wrong but basically what iv found to work for me and others over the last 13 yrs mixed with a bit of humour hopefully , you have to have a sense of humour when too live with a dog n pigeon as pets :default_biggrin:   :default_beerchug:

Posted
8 minutes ago, Ricardo said:

 .....realising that not everyone will agree with you all the time is important to know as is seeing the other side of the coin .

A nice post Ricardo.

Some of my best friends and closest family are the ones who I've disagreed with the most over the years.We didn't cry foul, just stood up and moved on. We still have differing opinions, but the recognition and acceptance of that makes the bond stronger.

It's a two way thing.

  • Like 3
Posted

I for one have wanted you to post a " living aboard " thread. Would have been interesting how you got through the cold months , maybe you could back date it a bit!!!

Im glad you stayed around, the world needs diversity, you appear to wear your heart on your sleeve. Now get typing !!!

  • Like 3
Posted

For many years I was chair of a community group in Thamesmead where we first lived when we got married. It was lively to say the least,at times my views were not the same as others.Some debates the toys came out of the pram.However all sides shared there love and care for the community. It's my belief the same here.Ricardo I am glad you are still here,I agree with others before anyone leaves stand back and give it time before you go.

Ian 

  • Like 1
Posted

I think it might be helpful to get away from the so called friendly forum tag, we are all individuals and collectively the forum, some have made friends with other members, some have formed an association with others on a basis of mutual interest others prefer to remain just individual members taking each thread on its own merits, there is also a social side to the forum which runs alongside but is not integral to the forum, within all of that I don`t believe any of us are or have enemies just people we agree or disagree with at one time or another depending on the topic and usually based on our life experiences and upbringing, open debate is the lifeblood of not just forums but civilised society, a sterile environment where every body just agrees is neither healthy or productive. 

What matters is that each of us accepts another`s right to a different opinion, digests what it might contain that we could learn from and then either agree or agree to disagree with the content without looking for enmity and move on to the next topic of interest without looking for personal issues.

Fred

  • Like 3
Posted
7 hours ago, Wonderwall said:

I for one have wanted you to post a " living aboard " thread. Would have been interesting how you got through the cold months , maybe you could back date it a bit!!!

Im glad you stayed around, the world needs diversity, you appear to wear your heart on your sleeve. Now get typing !!!

I also asked you (Ricardo) to start a living aboard thread, as Neil said so very interesting to read about winter months etc. It's a bit of an unrealistic dream of mine to live aboard with two young kids and not as easy, I would imagine, as a one or two week holiday every year where we are living that dream for such a short while.

So come on, as Neil says, get typing

Any comments you feel are in any way attacking, rise above them and don't bite....... or you could always send them to me :default_biggrin:

Grace

  • Like 6
Posted
1 hour ago, rightsaidfred said:

What matters is that each of us accepts another`s right to a different opinion, digests what it might contain that we could learn from and then either agree or agree to disagree with the content without looking for enmity and move on to the next topic of interest without looking for personal issues.

Never a truer word said! (I expect there probably has been but that sums it all up for now anyway.) Forums can be scary places, particularly if your view seemingly differs from everybody else’s once in a while. If I have something go against me, I say very sternly to myself ‘deal with it and move on’. And it works for me. I think maybe that’s what you have now done Ricardo so good on yer! Quite a few have asked you to do a ‘liveaboard’ thread and I hope you will. Be open to lots of questioning because us landlubbers have a lot to learn. 

  • Like 1
Posted

I too look forwards to view of life living aboard. especially as a few months ago it looked highly likely I'd be joining their ranks.

As far as Ricardo stopping posting here, I'm glad he has reconsidered.

It can be hard to accept that when a number of people disagree with you, firstly, it's not personal however much it seems like it is, and second, you might well be correct in what you say, but others have differing ways of achieving their aims. Or, as has never (to my knowledge) been said. "You can take a horse to water, but don't get pi**ed off if it then drinks from some other ba***rd's bowl."

Never ever be put off from putting your view forward just because you think it might be unpopular and shot down in flames.

I was a bit antsy about not condemning the man who shot the heron to rescue the duckling. I expected to get some flack for that. It never came. Such is life.

  • Like 3
  • Haha 3
Posted

There are always differing opinions. Period. It matters not if that is online or not, but I don't think it is always about what someone thinks it is about a 'collective direction'. I can best sum this up if I use Shiela as an example.  She very  rarely will drink alcohol, and when we are together or with friends that is fine - there is no judgment, no pressure. However when we have been at social gatherings where the collective  direction of people is to drink 'to have a good time' she feels very much pressured to join in and drink alcohol  and almost judged to be drinking a Coke and not a white wine for example

You can take all sorts of examples where people generally have their own character, choices and feelings on things which may not be perceived by a majority to be 'fitting in' and so I think it can happen here, on a Forum too. 

If a larger percentage of people go with one direction (or opinion) then someone who may not be following the same path is made to feel perhaps small - not taken into account or heard, and then every time they may try to explain and defend their point of view be seen as being troublesome.

I know there have been cases where Richardo and I have had a difference of opinion on things, and I know some things I have said may have been taken by him to seem derogatory. Can I use his open and frank post therefore to 'clear the air' myself and say this was not my intention to cause any upset as I am sure it was not his.   There have of late been some pretty 'hot topics' up for discussion and it is this freedom to share, and engage with people that makes this Forum so rich and far better than Facebook or other groups.

I would  be interested too in hearing from the horses mouth about living on a boat, since this is a subject that is often talked about but rarely from those who actually are living on water.  I am sure it would mean a lot of questions from people who in turn could learn a lot and may inspire some to take the plunge themselves.

  • Like 5
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Posted

I am fairly fortunate to have a house in Norfolk  and a boat in Brundall, given that I have the choice where to "stay" I am usually on the boat, as quite simply I'd rather be there and that included most of the winter we've just been through.

Posted
18 minutes ago, LondonRascal said:

 I am sure it would mean a lot of questions from people who in turn could learn a lot and may inspire some to take the plunge themselves.

Hypothetically I hope. Some of us are getting on a bit and have a propensity to wander off the deck.

Andrew

Posted
20 hours ago, Ricardo said:

A while back I decided that I had enough , however in hindsight I feel that I might well have acted in haste , its pretty obvious I'm still active anyway so I figured I best explain things  .

Basically I got rather fed up mostly because I felt it didn't matter what the subject was or what I said I would face the same opposing posts , not that I mind a bit of banter but constantly it wears yiu down n to be honest I lost confidence in posting , that returned after a while and I started posting again only to be shot down once more for no reason other than I hadn't explained that I hadn't left .

Anyway cutting a long story short I'm after a lot of discussion with various people stopping right here. Now I know of late there's been the words unfriendly forum used but I don't see it like that at all , realising that not everyone will agree with you all the time is important to know as is seeing the other side of the coin .

So I hope you'll forgive me for my moment of madness and thanks to everyone for your kind words in  the original thread .

Oh BTW a couple of member's asked a long time ago if I could do a thread on the alternative life style of living onboard , having thought about it dismissed it thought about it more iv decided wat the heck why not , my intention is not to say this is how you do it n the rest is wrong but basically what iv found to work for me and others over the last 13 yrs mixed with a bit of humour hopefully , you have to have a sense of humour when too live with a dog n pigeon as pets :default_biggrin:   :default_beerchug:

As long as you get likes in your postings Ric, you cant be going far wrong and I'm sure there would be quite a few people who would miss your posts. As for a live aboard, I worked with a electrician who got the title 'Smelly Bob', as we couldn't come to conclusion whether he was saving on soap and water, or he just simply didn't use deodorant!

  • Like 1
Posted

The one thing i`ve always liked about this forum is that the vast majority of the time, on here, you can publicly disagree with people and posts, and nobody, or very few, are bothered, and those that feel they have to say something about why they disagree with me, and their REASONS why they disagree, are done in all honesty and a friendly way. It`s not like that ALL the time, but certainly for majority of it. I`ve said elswhere, that at times, other members have countered my posts in a stern manner (like the punn, STERN), but often, i go back and read what i`ve posted, and realised i could have phrased things differently.  That said, we don`t live in a perfect world, and we can`t all like eachother, god knows the number of people i`ve upset on facebook, but i do have very strong, and unbending views on certain subjects, but that does`nt mean i don`t respect other peoples views, even though i totally disagree with them. I have to be entirely honest, and say i`m quick to shout out at times, but only if i believe i`m being victimised, or stabbed in the back, but then i doubt i`m the only one. But there are still a number of people on this forum who i`ve had the great pleasure of meeting, who know i`m completely different than the way i sometimes come across.

  • Like 3
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Posted

Glad you stayed Richard.. The NBN in general is a friendly place, it's certainly the go to place for up to date news and gossip on the broads and a the debating place.. Everyone on here has the passion for the broads which sometimes does explode but I think in general everyone's thoughts are in the right place.

I'll help with your liveaboard blog.. Let's go with the winter section first.. It's cold... bloody cold.. Like toilet water frozen cold and icicles forming on the inside of the alloy boat hatches... but going anywhere with heating is like walking into the centre of the Sun.. you landlubbers really like to have the heating on max.. roll on spring..please..

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