Timbo Posted December 27, 2016 Author Share Posted December 27, 2016 Oh and...Lip stiff, chin up, sense of humour intact. I apologise to those scarred for life at the thought of juggling Uncle Albert's balls! 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennyMorgan Posted December 27, 2016 Share Posted December 27, 2016 Tim, having recently been where you now you have my deepest sympathies, not an easy place to be in. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bound2Please Posted December 28, 2016 Share Posted December 28, 2016 Tim having been where you are with Mum this year. I dont envy, they dis sort of sort Mum with drugs and modern technology. The trouble is I am now living with is did I make the right choices? . As where she is now dont get me wrong is very nice and they do look after her very well. But is it living as she would have wished?. But what ever you decide will be the right decission at the time Tim. Our thoughts are with you. Charlie and Wench 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracie Posted December 28, 2016 Share Posted December 28, 2016 Oh Charlie, please don't beat yourself up over the decisions you've made concerning your Mum, the main thing is that you love and care for her and want what's best for her, surely to give her the more intense care she needs, the decision was the absolute right one, Pat yourself on the back for being a loving and caring son, I'm sure she would tell you that herself if she could, I hope my sons turn into such caring Men as you and Tim so obviously are Grace 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timbo Posted December 28, 2016 Author Share Posted December 28, 2016 Update from last night. The old feller had rallied a bit by the time I got there last night with Ellie. Well, rallied enough to shout at me at any rate...made me bloody jump! I was pleased to see he had a good nurse on duty yesterday. The nurses had been mentioning Dad was uncooperative. I had mentioned on several occasions they had the 'known as' sign above the bed filled in with his christian name. My Dad and my Grandfather shared the same name of Richard. They both worked at International Harvesters. Grandad was known as 'Big Dick' and my Dad... has been known as Gordon for most of his life. Once the nurses started using his name amazingly he started to respond positively to their requests. An interesting observation on 'family'. Once my mother died my family span out of control. We lost contact with family with which we were once close, I got divorced soon after...twice. Although Ellie and I have been together for over fifteen years I realised that she's never met any of my family other than my Dad and daughter. Speaking to my Uncle yesterday, after his wife died two years ago, he's also lost contact and my cousin is now divorced. There's a correlation here I think. The women of the family holding the family together. So today Ellie is coming with me to pick up my Uncle and take him to see his brother. We are then taking him out for something to eat before driving back to Doncaster to take him home. As Grace says Charlie, we can only do our best. I suppose I'm lucky in that I have a remarkable 'team' around me to help. As I was so poorly when I took on caring for Dad full time after his divorce a year ago, Ellie made sure of the people who look after me and the people that look after Dad. So my decisions, although ultimately mine, are guided as everyone from Dad's carer to his solicitor will chip in advice based on me not shuffling off this mortal coil trying to sort Dad out. To reverse one of my Mum's favourite sayings 'Dads and dogs...who'd have 'em? Only us what's forced!" 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BroadAmbition Posted December 28, 2016 Share Posted December 28, 2016 Chuffin eck Tim, you are right up against it here aren't you? (I have been off keeping up with forums of any kind for the past week or so, so just getting caught up) All you are going through and yet you still keep your sense of humour and positive manner up - remarkable and respect to you. I wish you and Uncle Albert all the best Griff P,S I am hoping to be at Pinewood, Blyton tomorrow Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Polly Posted December 28, 2016 Share Posted December 28, 2016 I'd second that Gracie, these are good people. Yes, being where you are Tim, is very hard indeed. I have tried to protect my loved ones when it comes to it by making my wishes clear now, so that those hard choices have already been made by me, not them. On hard subjects....if you haven't made a power of attorney DO ONE ! No matter what age, life can throw us and LPAs help you to be helped. We have had endless aggro because my friend with dementia didn't do one and became unable to make rational choices, helping her was 300% more difficult. Just saying.... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grendel Posted December 28, 2016 Share Posted December 28, 2016 Polly are you inferring that Timbo is rational at the moment? I fear we may be too late for Tim Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Polly Posted December 28, 2016 Share Posted December 28, 2016 I never infer, nasty habit! Actually, everything is relative and 'sound mind' could be 'soundly bonkers' after all..... My poor prose! 'You' in the context of that post meant 'you lot' rather than picking on Tim, who is a sorted, if 'interesting' person! If one were Royal one would have said 'one' rather than 'you lot', but as one is common ..... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timbo Posted December 29, 2016 Author Share Posted December 29, 2016 OK so Wednesday was a 'weird' day. Went to pick up my Uncle from Doncaster to take him to see Dad. Now how best to describe Uncle Albert's younger brother? At one time I would have described Bill's most distinctive feature as his voice. Deep, booming with an amazing timbre. Now I would describe Bill's most distinctive feature as his beard. Since being registered as blind, Bill has cultivated a most amazing beard. Bill has always been a handsome chap, big strapping ex rugby player, RN like Uncle Albert, looks like Jeff Bridges...with almost the same beard and sounds like Brian Blessed...with a more pronounced Yorkshire accent. What was weird at the hospital was that Dad seemed to react to the sound of my better half Ellie's voice. Dad would seem to fight to wake up, focus for a few seconds when Ellie spoke to him and then fall back to sleep. Dad is thoroughly restless, resisting all attempts to change his position or to allow anyone to give him a drink. He's actively fighting the nurses trying to care for him. Weirder still was the report from the nurse where she assured us that once the antibiotics had been administered fully in two days time Dad would be back to normal. Stark contrast to what the doctor I saw the day before had to say. The nurse also reported that the doctor had seen Dad that morning. On the way out of the hospital we bumped into the doctor I had seen the day before. "How is your father , I have not seen him today?" asked the doctor. Weird. Firstly because I've never known a doctor to acknowledge relatives away from the patients bed. Weird but good. Secondly according to the nurse he'd seen Dad that morning. Back in the car Bill voiced a concern I've had for a few weeks now. Its almost as if Dad doesn't want to get better. Still we can only wait and see. Driving home we took a detour. Doncaster planners must have been holding their meetings in bloody Wetherspoons as Parrots Corner has been redesigned by committee. Racecourse Roundabout, South Parade I was fine. Aliens seem to have nicked the Gaumont! Christchurch onto Printing Office Street behind the Market...all good, St Georges...what the hell have they done to North Road Bridge? It seems that Doncaster Council Planning Department has the same motto as West Lindsey. 'Finishing what the Luftwaffe Started!'. Griff if you can get out of Donny in one piece...in the same century or even the same dimension you must be running a TARDIS instead of a van! 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BroadAmbition Posted December 29, 2016 Share Posted December 29, 2016 At least Uncle Albert is still with you, but yes some concern if the signals of not wanting to get better are strong, Maybe he has decided he has had enough of the struggle and just wants to slip away and rest, not much you or the staff can do for him if that is his mind set. I wish you/family strength to get through it all the same You certainly did take a detour. Parrots Corner the redesign is of course due to the new link road through to the M18 - It's been a boon to reducing trafffic in Donny centre, the junction at Parrots corner is ok once you know it, however it is soon to be complicated by the 2nd phase link road going through to Robin Hood Airport at what was RAF Finningley. The Gaumont was indeed stolen by aliens and replaced with a car park, but this was years ago, where have you been? North Road bridge - made it one way (Unless you are a bus / taxi) this is a big improvement on the first mad cap decision which was to close it altogether and send everything both ways over the then new St Georges bridge. My 'GriffTile' van knows the Donny roads far better than I do so no problem there, the Jeep is getting better at it aided by it's special number plates whereas the Tiger just revels in the challenge. I'm due closer to your neck of the woods today from 1100-ish - Blyton shooting ground Griff 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timbo Posted December 30, 2016 Author Share Posted December 30, 2016 I'm sad to say Dad passed away at around 6pm this afternoon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwanR Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 My sincerest condolences to you Timbo at such a sad time. Take good care of yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxwellian Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Condolences, thoughts are with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennyMorgan Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Tim, I am so sorry. Thanks for sharing your life with us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C.Ricko Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Hey Timbo, Sorry to read of your sad news. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arthur Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Thoughts and prayers are with you Tim Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deebee29 Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Our deepest sympathies Tim you are in our thoughts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BroadAmbition Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Gloom. You have my thoughts and sympathy Tim. You know where I am if you need owt Griff Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grendel Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 I am sorry to hear that Tim, my Condolences to you and your family, another blow to the forum family, I used to laugh at the tales of Uncle Alberts misdeeds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueH Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 So, so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Polly Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 So sorry to hear this Tim, condolences and prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizG Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 So sorry Tim, again no words Liz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bound2Please Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Our thoughts are with you at this sad time Tim Charlie and Wench Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wussername Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 A very sad end to this year. My thoughts are with you Tim. Andrew Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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