Rip For A Wonderful Lady

[Timbo]

My thoughts are with you John and Frances' daughters. I will echo Ray's comment 'you will get through this and we will help'. Call if you need anything at all my friend!

[FairTmiddlin]

John having lost my Brother jusy under 2 years ago. I know it leaves a large hole in your life. But that hole does heal over slowly, fill that hole with all of the great memories of the times you had together. It helps the healing

Will be raising a glass to Frances tonight.

[addicted]

As  you obviously know there isn't anyone on here who wont' be thinking of your sadness today and who won't be feeling sad for you. That many glasses will be raised to Frances there will probably be an upturn in the sales of alcohol everywhere!  I hope that is a comfort. it's bloody disgusting disease and causes so much grief. My thoughts are very much with you. I'm so so sorry

 

 

Carole

[Guest]

My sincere condolences John and my thought's and prayers are with you and the family , both my parents were struck down by this horrible disease , try to remember all the good times especially those that make you smile that helps a lot , of cause I'll raise a glass this afternoon , take care , Richard 

[donnygeoff]

My thoughts are with you and yours, MM, a glass will be raised.

[BroadAmbition]

Nightmare time for you John. I'm onboard 'B.A' (Womack Water), this evening I'm staying onboard and will certainly raise one as requested. My biggest concern is your uncertainty of where you will live.   Anyroadup you are in my thoughts. Use your mates / friends, that's what they are there for. Owt I can do - just ask 

Griff

[Gracie]

MY SISTER

If roses grow in heaven Lord

Please pick a bunch for me

Place them in my Sister's arms

And tell her they are from me

Tell her I love and miss her

And when she turns to smile

Place a kiss upon her cheek

And hold her for a while

Because remembering her is easy

I will do it all the way

She will be forever in my heart

Until we meet again one day

I posted similar when Eric lost his Mum, I hope it brings some comfort to you John

Very much thinking of you

Grace

[SteveO]

Sorry to hear your news John. Our thoughts are with you at this sad time.  Glass to be raised this evening. Hang on to the happy memories. Time will heal.

Regards

Steve

[WherryNice]

Sorry to hear your news MM, my thoughts are with you and yours

Sent from the Norfolk Broads Network mobile app

[Wench]

There are no word I can say to help your grief , but you have many friends out  there  who will raise a glass or  two with you , to Frances .

Inge

[YnysMon]

Really sorry to hear your sad news MM, and worried about your reference to not knowing where you will live.  Hold onto the blessing that your sister was so special.  When my Mam died earlier this year it so helped me to think about how blessed I've been in been born into such a loving family.

I just want to add that I loved Grace's poem.

Helen

[Bern]

So sorry to hear this John. We will raise our glasses high this evening as requested to Frances. If we can help please do not be afraid to let us know.

       Condolences to you all

            Bern, John, Grant, Michael and Sinead

 

[DaveB]

Thoughts and prayers are with you John,  glasses raised, flags lowered 

[Mouldy]

My thoughts are with you John.  Time does heal and life goes on.  My dad passed away on 13th February this year and not a day passes without something happening to remind me of him.   Remember the good times and stay strong for your nieces, for I'm sure that they will look to you to help them mourn their mum's passing.

[Wyndham]

MM please allow me also to offer my condolences on your loss, I have a sister I love so much, Gracie's poem  choked me. I feel your pain.

Life's a journey, and like any journey, sometime you gotta have help. Don't be afraid to ask, you're not alone.

 

[Chelsea14Ian]

Like everyone  has said,I am sorry to hear of your loss.If it's any help remember the good and best times of her life.Time will soften the sadness. 

Ian 

[alexandlorna]

Sorry to hear of your loss , our thoughts are with you x

[MauriceMynah]

To say I'm moved by the response on this thread is the understatement to end all understatements. You are all a great bunch of friends.

There is a part of my original post that needs clarification from me. It will involve a bit of history, but I should be able to keep it to just a couple of paragraphsor so.

 I said

"I don't know what I'm going to do, I don't know where I'm going to live, I don't know how I'm going to go forwards from there,"

The background to that is that I had been our parents full time carer effectively from 2001 to 2012, our father dying in 2007 and mother in 2012. The unwritten agreement was that after mum died, I'd move in to my sisters house. (she had been a widow since 2006). That is what happened and all was well.

Now that my sister has gone, her two daughters will be the beneficiaries of her will. My sister was going to change her will to update it mainly because it had been written when their two daughters were young children and that back then it was far more likely that I would have married and had family of my own so I wasn't mentioned in it. 

My two nieces (and their husbands) have told me that I'm not to worry and they'll not be rushing me in any way, but in fairness rush or no rush, I can't carry on living here (not to mention it's a 5 bedroom house with granny annex) and I have both literally and metaphorically a shed load of bits and pieces to house, sell or give away.  

I suspect that for a while I'm going to have to live on Nyx, possibly for 18 months or more so I'm going to have to be asking Ricardo for some advice on that one. I have furniture that's mine, tools and equipment and all manner of other stuff that needs to go. 

That, I hope explains the comment I made, Any suggestions most welcome, but most of all, Thank you all so much for the thoughts and wishes you have given me. 

 

[Polly]

I was recently executor to a friend's will. There was a carer who wasn't  mentioned officially, but I knew Margaret wanted her to be remembered. The solicitor was fairly bewildered that I was determined to give away some of my personal small bequest to her, there was no legal requirement etc...

The mechanism is called a 'Deed of Variation'  determined by the beneficiaries, whereby part of the legacy could reach you and add financial security. It's a possibility.

[Viking23]

I think it is very difficult without going into detail of your personal or financial affairs to give advice.

For example, your age, if still in work, or able to draw down a pension, or are currently drawing a pension or planning to in the future. 

Your assets, including shares, property etc

I am certainly not in a position to advise, but we recently changed our wills so our children and grand children could not be bypassed in the event of either my wife or I passing first and remarrying.

 A situation that happened to me, my mother died first, then my dad who remarried, he sold his house, spent "his"  collateral lived in her house, then he died, then recently she died, there was allegedly no will, or shall we say " No Will found" according to her brother who was first on the scence., so all the assets whent to my step mother's brother, who she was astranged from.

If this was France, legally, her brother would have got half, and the remainder (50%) split equally between my sister and I.

I am not money grabbing, I made provision and monitored it over the years. and people should not expect hand me downs. Good job too. However, I believe it is not the wishes of my step mother that her astranged Brother gets it all.

It is so essential to make sure wills are water tight under all conditions, but sadly  people take poor advice or no advice at all. 

You might want to get professional support to see what you are entitled to, as you might be classed as " Of no fixed  abode" and I wonder if you should take advice before you declare you have a boat that you could live on.  

Might be better to be actually "evicted" in writing, then the local would  have to home you.

Hope it helps. 

Richard

[Guest]

1 hour ago, MauriceMynah said:

To say I'm moved by the response on this thread is the understatement to end all understatements. You are all a great bunch of friends.

There is a part of my original post that needs clarification from me. It will involve a bit of history, but I should be able to keep it to just a couple of paragraphsor so.

 I said

"I don't know what I'm going to do, I don't know where I'm going to live, I don't know how I'm going to go forwards from there,"

The background to that is that I had been our parents full time carer effectively from 2001 to 2012, our father dying in 2007 and mother in 2012. The unwritten agreement was that after mum died, I'd move in to my sisters house. (she had been a widow since 2006). That is what happened and all was well.

Now that my sister has gone, her two daughters will be the beneficiaries of her will. My sister was going to change her will to update it mainly because it had been written when their two daughters were young children and that back then it was far more likely that I would have married and had family of my own so I wasn't mentioned in it. 

My two nieces (and their husbands) have told me that I'm not to worry and they'll not be rushing me in any way, but in fairness rush or no rush, I can't carry on living here (not to mention it's a 5 bedroom house with granny annex) and I have both literally and metaphorically a shed load of bits and pieces to house, sell or give away.  

I suspect that for a while I'm going to have to live on Nyx, possibly for 18 months or more so I'm going to have to be asking Ricardo for some advice on that one. I have furniture that's mine, tools and equipment and all manner of other stuff that needs to go. 

That, I hope explains the comment I made, Any suggestions most welcome, but most of all, Thank you all so much for the thoughts and wishes you have given me. 

 

No problem at all , ask away when ever you need to I'd be happy to help in anyway I can John .

[AdnamsGirl]

So sorry for you. It's such a difficult time made so much more stressful given your circumstances. I lost my mum in June and I miss her dreadfully. There is just such a huge hole in my life and I'm sure you must feel the same. Emotions change from day to day and, despite having support from family, I suddenly felt incredibly loneĺy. Like you, my life for the last 15 years or so revolved around looking after our mum's and life now feels very different. We lost kev's mum last year and now mine.  I can't offer advice, but i sincerely hope that things will work out for you. There are so many practicalities to deal with but take time to grieve, remember those good times in your life with your sister and look after yourself.

Carol

[Bedslad]

R I P Frances

what a wonderful forum this is

 

[Gracie]

"What a wonderful forum this is", do you know I was just thinking the same thing, as well as a boating forum it's a support network for so many other things, definitely one of a kind

Grace

[finny]

Sorry to hear for your very sad loss John and hopefully with time you find your good self with a more long term secure future 

 

kind regards Finny